grown up guilt

my grandmother always turning on the light for me while i read and a flare of annoyance
grandma i can decide how much light i need to read i can turn it on for myself
i am practically grown up now

in our grad student apartment he always turns the light off without a word until i say HEY and he
says you don’t need the light on its daytime for god sakes, saves on the electricity bill

and i think of her pinched forehead sweet like strawberry jam hovering over my eight-year-old tense shoulder like fishing line taut rolling my eyes in an exasperated huff
her eyes might strain without the light, she says i don’t want her eyes to strain



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